Most of us think we have the ability to persuade our spouse to agree to an out of court settlement, but decades after decades of divorce wars indicates that we do not.
Divorce negotiations differ from the day-to-day interaction of married couples, which usually includes a reasonable expectation that we can influence each other's thinking. We mistakenly rely on the same communications skills that we used during the marriage, but our inability to "get through to our spouse" effectively is typically the major reason for the divorce in the first place.
We all tend to naively assume that our logic or our plight will influence our spouse into accepting our thinking, but this just doesn't happen easily, despite our optimism.
Divorce puts us at our worst at a time in our life when we must be at our best, and no one ever told us about the "be at our best" part. This handicaps us immensely. Our common sense, verbal skills, and general savvy do not prepare us for these conversations.
This blog aims to provide the necessary instructions to make negotiating a divorce settlement with our spouse a do-it-yourself project..
